• Okay, okay! I take it back. Unfuck you.
  • You say I’m a bitch like it’s a bad thing.Well, this day was a total waste of make-up.
  • Well, aren’t we a damn ray of sunshine?
  • Don’t bother me, I’m living happily ever after.
  • Do I look like a people person?
  • This isn’t an office. It’s hell with fluorescent lighting.
  • I started out with nothing and I still have most of it left.
  • Therapy is expensive. Popping bubble wrap is cheap. You choose.
  • Why don’t you try practicing random acts of intelligence and senseless acts of self-control?
  • I’m not crazy. I’ve been in a very bad mood for 30 years.
  • Sarcasm is just one more service I offer.
  • Do they ever shut up on your planet?
  • I’m not your type. I’m not inflatable.
  • Stress is when you wake up screaming and you realize you haven’t gone to sleep yet!
  • Back off!! You’re standing in my aura.
  • Don’t worry. I forgot your name too.
  • I work 45 hours a week to be this poor.
  • Not all men are annoying. Some are dead.
  • Wait … I’m trying to imagine you with a personality.
  • Chaos, panic and disorder .. my work here is done.
  • Ambivalent? Well, yes and no.
  • You look like shit. Is that the style now?
  • Earth is full. Go home.
  • Aww, did I step on your poor little itty bitty ego?
  • I’m not tense, just terribly, terribly alert.
  • A hard-on doesn’t count as personal growth.
  • You are depriving some village of an idiot.
  • If assholes could fly, this place would be an airport.
  • Look in my eyes … Do you see one ounce of gives-a-shit?